Day 1 of Cycle 7

Wayne is at the hospital this morning - gearing up for Day 1. As we pulled out of the driveway, he said, "By mid-October this (chemo protocol) will be all over with."

We are both wishing we could just fast-forward to that point. There is so much to look forward to. The biggest, of course, is that he will be feeling good for at least a 2 month stretch. Now, it's for a few days. I just can't wait for him to feel like himself for long periods of time. For him to be able to enjoy himself and the kids ... to be able to celebrate the holidays and to be able to think about something other than chemo and hospitals (although you know we will still be thinking about it a lot).

So today, we swung by the donut shop to bring donuts for the patients and staff. Something to say thank you. An act of "I am still OK to eat. I hope you are, too."

Claire is down for her morning nap and Caeden is playing with his train. I am grateful to be here with them, but wishing I was there with him. He is so brave. I know you all know him to be funny and sarcastic and caring. But do you know just how amazingly brave he is? He never complains. He goes into the hospital this morning talking about all the work he needs to get done - conference calls, meetings, and work. He says this for me. I know it's his way of trying to tell me it's just another day for him. I wish that were true, because all I want to do is sit as close as I can to him and talk about fast-forwarding to mid-October. Walks in neighborhood, trick or treating with the kids, decorating the house for the holidays, Christmas shopping and getting together with friends and family. Talking about our 15th anniversary. Talk about how much I love him.

But for now, I watch the clock and wait for him to tell me I can come get him.

I wait.